Hockey Planes
by FluffyCanada123
Summary: Canada, The Netherlands, Russia, Prussia, and other countries are stuck on a plane! They are flying to their team's championships and hilariousness ensues. I suck at summaries please give my story a chance!
1. Chapter 1

**Okay so I'm going to write a fanfiction because I'm extremely bored. And it's going to be on a plane because I'm on a plane. And the main character are going to be Ivan(Russia), Mathew(Canada), The Netherlands(Lars), and Gilbert(Prussia) because I love them all. And it's not going to be that great of a fanfic because I have never written on before. So there. Since I wrote this on a plane and was really tired, the first chapter sucks. I would like to believe that it gets way better. **

Oh. My. God.

Why won't it shut up?

I'm not going to make it alive.

Mathew felt his eye twitching as he stared out the plane window. He knew he should be happy, he was flying to hockey championships after all. But right now, he couldn't bring himself to even smile. That... _Noise _wound't shut up. Mathew sighed and looked around. He was in the window seat next to Gilbert, and Ivan was in the aisle seat. Both Gilbert and Ivan were sound asleep, the Russian boy clutching a pipe and smiling. (And no, don't ask me how he got it through security. Just don't.) Gilbert's head was resting his head against Mathew's shoulder. Normally Mathew would smile at Gilbert but now he just couldn't. It wouldn't go away. Why me? It was giving him a migraine. Thinking up new hockey plays wouldn't even make it go away. Mathew pinched his nose and breathed deeply, hoping that it would make his headache go away. It just made his nose hurt. Mathew started to bang his head against the seat in front of him. He moaned. It wasn't fair everyone else could sleep through the noise. It just kept droning on and on. Suddenly, it got louder. Oh no, the small Canadian thought. He stopped banging his head when he realized it was just adding to his headache. He focused on the red light red blinking on the wing. Blink... Blink... Blink... Suddenly it was just as annoying as the noise. Well, almost. He didn't think anything could be more annoying than the noise. The blinking light still gave him a bigger headache though. By now, his head felt like Ivan was beating it with his pipe. Then, the impossible happened. The noise got even louder. Mathew slowly felt himself losing it... "MAPLE! I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" Mathew then ran to the bathroom where he spent the remainder of the plane ride. (Or so he thought)

Gilbert suddenly woke up. He stretched and looked around. "That's weird," he muttered. He couldn't see Mattie. He thought about about asking Ivan, but decided against it when he saw the pipe. He didn't want to be the one that woke him. Maybe Mattie was with Lars. Gilbert twisted around in his seat but he didn't see Mattie. Gilbert frowned. He had just had this awesome dream and he wanted to tell Mattie about it. Gilbert sighed, it looked like everyone else was asleep. Now what was he supposed to do? Suddenly a demonic grin spread on his face. "That's what I should do", Gilbert said to himself, smirking. He slowly reached into his bag and pulled out a permanent marker, being careful not wake the Russian boy. He uncapped the marker and looked to make sure Ivan was sound asleep. Gilbert smiled and softly wrote Lars was here on Ivan's forehead. He looked at Ivan's face and decided he had nothing to lose. Gilbert drew a curly mustache on Ivan's lip and tried to control his laughter. Ivan was going to kill Lars when he woke up. Meanwhile, Gilbert was going to be safely watching from afar.


	2. Chapter 2

**Sorry my chapters might be kinda short; I'm still new at this. I'm going to try and update at least once a week. Please review! It would mean a lot. Okay, on to the story! **

Matthew yawned and looked at the door. Some idiot kept knocking on the bathroom and it had woken Matthew up. He didn't really want to leave the bathroom, his seat sucked. Anyway, so he had been sleeping peacefully and then some hoser woke up. Was the other bathroom broken or something? "OPEN THE DOOR! Wait, why did that sound familiar?

Five minutes earlier…

Gilbert looked at Ivan and tried to control his laughter. "Any minute now", he muttered, smirking. In the seat next to him, Ivan twitched. Gilbert tensed. Ivan opened his eyes sleepily. "Gilbert why are you staring at me," the Russian boy inquired. Gilbert just handed him a mirror. Ivan stared at his face in the mirror before turning to Gilbert and smiling creepily. Gilbert flinched, why the heck was Ivan smiling? He was supposed to kill Lars. "You realize I know your handwriting, Da? Oh shit, Gilbert hadn't thought of that. "Don't worry, after you become one with Mother Russia, I can beat up Lars too, Da?" Ivan said, his hands clutching the water pipe. Gilbert's face paled and he started to sweat. His plan wasn't working at all. And why the fuck was Ivan still smiling? It was creeping him out. Suddenly, Gilbert realized what he had to do. RUN!

Back to the present…

"Gilbert? Are you knocking on my door?" Matthew asked curiously. "YES NOW OPEN THE DOOR PERSON WHO KNOWS THE AWESOME ME! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN THERE?" Gilbert yelled not so curiously. Matthew sighed and opened the door. Gilbert ran into the bathroom and locked the door behind him. "What the heck Gil, why are you acting strange?" Well, stranger than normal Matthew amended. "Kolkolkolkolkolkol.." "Wait, was that Ivan?" Matthew paled. Matthew grabbed the front of Gilbert's shirt and yanked him. "WHAT DID YOU DO TO IVAN?!" Gilbert pouted and said, "Why do you always assume that I'm the one that caused the trouble Birdie?" Matthew raised an eyebrow. "Okay so fine this might have been my fault, but Ivan's being totally un-awesome," Gilbert whined. Matthew rolled his eyes and said in a deadly serious voice, "What did you do to Ivan?" Gilbert looked around, not meeting Matthew's eyes. "Gilbert…" Matthew warned. "Okay fine I wrote on Ivan's head and said Lars did it but the Ivan was totally not awesome and recognized my handwriting!" Matthew paled even more. "YOU DID WHAT?" The two boys began to argue, ignoring the banging on the door. (Bad idea, boys )

Outside the door…

Ivan smiled and began to laugh, "Kolkolkolkolkolkol." They had no idea what they were getting into. Ivan began chant…

Inside the door…

"Why are you such an idiot Gil!" "How was I supposed to know that he could recognize my handwriting?" "Your handwriting sucks, anyone could recognize it!" "That was mean Birdie! You're being totally un awesome right now!" "I'm not the one who got us stuck in a bathroom with Ivan trying to kill us Gilbert!" "It was an accident!" "So was that time you thought crabs didn't have claws, yet I still got pinched!" "You swore you would never bring that up again!" Suddenly Matthew stopped. "Gil, what's that green light coming from the door?" Gilbert face palmed. "Oh yeah I totally forgot, Ivan can do spells." Slowly they turned towards the door. "Maple."

Outside the door…

Ivan smirked. It was done. It wasn't a very a complicated spell, but the Prussian was too dumb to figure it out anyway. "Mattie might be problem though," Ivan mused. Suddenly he grinned evilly. He had to make a few changes to the spell. Kolkolkolkolkolkol…

**I'm going to make a second author's note because I can and my first one was really short. I'm sorry it's taking a really long to introduce the characters, I will introduce Lars in the next character. I think this chapter is better than the last one, my writing is getting better. ** **Also, I made a ton of changes to the first chapter so if you read the first version I would read it over again.**


	3. Chapter 3: Flo Rida

**Yay! People followed me! (It was kind of pathetic how excited I got when I saw the follows.) So in this chapter Lars and hopefully a few other characters get introduced. Also Ivan in this chapter (and probably the rest of the story) is going to be slightly different than what he normally is because he is awesome. And I hate it when he's not. Please review!**

Lars rubbed his eyes and looked around. What the hell?! Suddenly Lars was wide awake. He nudged Antonio and asked, "Do you see what I see?" Toni nodded, his face white. Ivan was walking towards them with a creepy smile on the face. Behind him was a green light that the passengers were all were doing their best to ignore, they had no inclination to get killed by Ivan. "Oh shit," Lars muttered. What was Ivan mad about now? Antonio started laughing. "Why are you laughing?! We are about to get killed!" Lars shrieked. Toni smirked and said, "Look at his face." A feeling of dread came over Lars. "H-hey Ivan, you know I didn't write that, r-right?" Damn, he was stuttering. So not cool. "Yes, but you should still become one with mother Russia, Da?" Ivan answered, still smiling. "You're starting to creep me out, Vodka Bastard." Oh shit, Lars had forgotten about Romano. "Shh Lovi, Ivan is about to beat up Lars." "What the hell Antonio?!" Lars said, his voice unnaturally high. "Haha you sound like a girl." "Shut up Romano!"

Meanwhile...

Canada sighed. "It appears we're locked in Gil." "No shit Birdie!" They had tried everything to get out of the bathroom once they realized Ivan had left. The door wouldn't budge and nobody would answer their calls for help. "It's official Gil, we're screwed." "This door is totally unawesome Mattie!" Gilbert whined. "Well there's no use in complaining. I'm sure someone will eventually save us." Prussia shrieked and said, "The key word being eventually!" "Stop being such a drama queen Gil, and just relax." Gilbert pouted. "Fine, but what are we supposed to do?" Matthew thought about it. Before Gilbert had arrived, he had just slept, but there wasn't really enough space for that anymore. Maybe they could play a game. "Do you have any cards Gil?" Recently Gilbert had been obsessed with playing cards, saying he was too awesome to lose. "Oh, I actually do Birdie!" Matthew smiled at his over excited friend. "I told you we'd be fine. What do you want to play?" "Oh Mattie do you what to play Gin Rummy?! It's like the awesomest game ever!" "Sure, what do you want to bet?"

Back to Lars…

Suddenly Ivan burst out laughing. "You should have seen your face!" he gasped between laughs. Lars and Toni looked at each other, confusion on their faces. "I wouldn't beat you up because Gilbert told me to, I'd rather do it on my own time, Da?" Lars couldn't believe his luck, "So… You're not going to hurt me?" Ivan just smiled and said, "Not now, kolkolkolkolkolkol." Lars sighed with relief. He chose to ignore the other part. "So what did you want anyway?" Ivan pointed to the bathroom. "I locked Gilbert and Mattie in the bathroom and was wondering if you wanted in on the fun, Da?" Lars, Antonio, and Romano looked at each other and said in unison, "Hell yeah!"

The Bathroom Again…

Oh God. Matthew couldn't believe it. Gilbert had chosen the worst thing ever to bet. Like, apocalypse bad. "Are you okay Birdie? You look kind of pale." Gilbert leaned forward and frowned. Matthew sighed. Gil could be kinda oblivious sometimes. See, Gilbert had decided that whoever lost would have to make a prank call to a person and the winner's choice. At first glance, that didn't sound so bad, but now Matthew was paying. Hard. "I don't see what the problem is Birdie, all I asked you to do was call Hungary and sing Whistle." Gilbert smiled innocently. "The problem is that she's going to kill me with her frying pan!" Matthew said while having a panic attack. Gilbert laughed and said, "Don't worry Mattie, she'll be too busy with her bloody nose. Besides, she's not even on the plane." Matthew smiled bitterly. "She'll find a way, trust me." "Well a bet's a bet, and a Canadian never goes back on his word, Right Mattie?" Matthew sighed for the thousandth time and took out his phone. "Fine."

"Who is this?"

"Matthew."

"Oh what do you want Matthew?"

"Can you blow my whistle baby…"

**Just wait till next chapter **


	4. Chapter 4: Gladiator

**Okay so it has come to my attention that everyone has a cover image. But me. So even though this story isn't that popular I was wondering if anyone would like to make cover art. I'm paranoid about using a picture from the Internet because the maker might get mad. Please review! Oh, also if you don't recognize any of these songs I would recommend looking them up.**

Matthew hung up and glared at Gilbert. He had a headache from Elizabeta's squealing. "Was that really necessary Gil?" Before Matthew had hung up, Gilbert decided it would be funny to shout into the phone, "Mattie's in loooooove!" Gilbert smirked. "Yes, yes it was." Matthew pouted. He could only imagine what Gilbert would make him do next. "Ready for the next round, Mattie?" "Ready to get your ass kicked, Gil?" Gilbert smirked. There was no way he would Mattie win. It was too much fun when he lost.

KOLKOLKOLKOL

Ivan rubbed his hands together and said, "What misery shall we put them through, Da?" Lars thought for a second. "First, we need to make sure Francis and Alfred don't find out about this. Especially Alfred." Antonio looked confused. "Why Francis?" Lars looked at Antonio for a second. "Uh, they're cousins?" Antonio nodded. He had forgotten. Romano frowned. "I can take care of the bastards if needed." "OMG thank you Lovi," Antonio squealed. Lars just shook his head. Antonio was starting to sound like Feliks. Ivan was ignoring them all. He was trying to think of what to do to them first. An evil grin spread over his face. "Listen up, I have an idea, Da?"

KESESESESESESESESESESE

"Maple!" Matthew had lost. Again. Oh God, what was Gil going to make him sing now? "Just admit it, I'm way awesomer than you at cards Birdie!" Matthew met his gaze stubbornly. "In. Your. Dreams." Gilbert laughed. Once Mattie loosened up, he was just as dramatic as Alfred. Now, what song to make Mattie do? Maybe he should make Birdie call Al. Oh that was a good idea! Let's see, he could sing Cooler Than Me, no that would hit a little close to home. Taylor Swift? Nah, too boring. Gilbert pouted. All the American artists were totally not awesome enough. Wait, didn't Arthur complain about some British singer? Nicole something. Rodman? Russel? Roberts! That was it, Nicola Roberts. Gilbert smiled, a devilish glint in his eye. "Gil, what are you going to do to me?" Mattie said hestintly, a little scared by the look in Gilbert's eyes. Okay, make that totally scared. "You'll see, my dear Birdie." Gilbert cackled. He knew exactly what song to do.

KOLKOLKOLKOLKOLKOLKOL

Ivan smiled. "We should record their conversation, Da?" Lars broke into a huge smile. "We could totally send it to Elizaveta!" Romano frowned. "Why do we need to involve the Fry Bastard?" Antonio looked shocked. "Lovi, you can't call a girl that! Besides, we could hear a juicy piece of gossip. She could twist the recording into some Yaoi thing and use it to torture Gilbert. He tortured us all before, so it should be fair!" Ivan thought for a second. That could work. He reached into his pocket and brought out an old tape recorder. Now, how to hide it? Normally he would just force it on them, but this required a little more subtlety. Maybe he could just slip it under the door? No, they might notice. Hmm… "How are we going to hide it? They can't notice it, Da?" They all thought for a second. Lars spoke up. "Maybe we could use one of your spells, Ivan." Romano shuddered. "You actually want to encourage the Vodka Bastard?" Ivan smiled, looking exactly like a demon. "I know a spell that will work, Da?"

KESESESESESE

"BIRDIE! YOU SHOULD GLADIATOR! BY NICOLA ROBERTS!" Matthew looked confused. He had never heard of this Nicola Roberts. Whoever she was, it couldn't be good by the look on Gilbert's face. Maybe he could convince Gil to pick another song. "Um, sorry Gil. I don't know that one." Gilbert's smile got even wider. "That's what Youtube is for, Mattie!" Matthew felt an unexplainable feeling of dread. "Who am I supposed to call?" Gilbert's smile got even bigger, if that was possible. "Alfred." Matthew paled. No, he couldn't involve Al in this. That would be too cruel. One look at Gibert's face was all Mattie needed to see for him to realize there was no backing down. "Maple," he muttered. He dialed the number and put Alfred on speaker.

"HEY MATTHEW! I HAVN'T HEARD FROM YOU IN AGES!"

"Hey Al."

"SO WHAT DID YOU CALL ME ABOUT!"

"Ding Dong Ding Dong…"


	5. Chapter 5: Diamonds

**I might use some country names because I don't know the human names. Sorry if it bothers you, but I can't really fix it. Anyway, this is my fifth chapter! I never thought I would get this far! Yay! Please review! And I really did feel the need to put Latvia in this story. Oh, and if you haven't heard of this song, you need start your life. Everyone should know this song.**

"YESSSSSSSSSS!" Matthew shouted. "In your face!" Gilbert pouted. "It was just luck," he mumbled. Secretly though, he was smiling. Birdie was so cute when he was excited, he thought wistfully. "You just lost, hoser!" Matthew wondered what song to do. He had to get really good revenge for what Gil had done. I mean, who had heard of Nicola Roberts anyway? By the time he had finished, Al was laughing so hard he couldn't breathe. Matthew sighed. Al was never going to forget that. So, what song? Something that would make Gil, "totally unawesome." Let's see, maybe Nicki Minaj? Nah, she didn't have anyone songs that would fit. God, American music was just terrible these days. (Yes, Matthew, because Canadian music is sooo much better.) Maybe he could make Gil call Ludwig. Yes, that would work. After all, Gil made him call Al.

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

Latvia looked nervously at Ivan, Antonio, Lars, and Antonio. They were all in a huddle and it was making him nervous. Ivan usually dragged him into whatever he was doing, and Latvia was just waiting until Ivan came over. Latvia liked Ivan, but sometimes he just didn't have any empathy. Maybe they would forget about him? No such luck. Ivan was staring at him. Latvia shivered. Ivan was looking especially pleased with himself. Latvia paled. That couldn't be good. Ivan crooked his finger at Latvia. Latvia shook his head. He didn't want to be a part of whatever Ivan was doing. Ivan raised his eyebrow. Damn, Latvia thought, he couldn't stand it when the Russian did that. He stubbornly shook his head again. Latvia wasn't going to be part of Ivan's pranks this time. Ivan tilted his head. Latvia felt his resolve weakening. Ivan smiled softly. _Damn! _Latvia couldn't resist The Smile. He sighed and walked over. "What do you want me to do?"

LALALALALALALALALALALALALA

Matthew smiled. "Gil, you have to call Ludwig." Gilbert paled. He could just imagine what West would do if Matthew made him sing a stupid song. "Why so pale Gil? I'm sure Ludwig will only make you do a hundred pushups," Matthew said with a sickeningly sweet smile. Gilbert's eyes widened. "Nooooo Birdie! I can't do more pushups! Remember the last time Luddy was made at me?! He made me run ten miles! I couldn't walk for days after! You're being so unawesome right now!" Matthew just smiled. He was enjoying torturing Gil. He definitely deserved it after Whistle. Matthew still got chills when he thought of seeing Hungary again. Matthew still had to pick the song though. Something that would blow Ludwig up. Even though he tried to ignore Gilbert, Ludwig could be very protective of his brother. Maybe something to do with bad behavior?

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

Antonio squealed. "You and Latvey are so cute, Ivan!" Ivan merely smiled. Romano rolled his eyes and said, "Latvia, we need you to do a very important job, so don't mess it up, okay?" Latvia shivered at the look in Romano eyes. He had always scared Latvia. It wasn't possible for someone to be that grumpy. It was unnatural. "S-scary…" he mumbled. Ivan smiled down him and Latvia close. "It's okay, we just need a favor. You can do it, Da?" Latvia turned red. "S-sure." Lars smiled. "Sweet! Okay, so what we need you to do is put this in the bathroom where Gilbert and Matthew are! Matthew is really nice, so he would never expect it you to do something bad." Lars pushed the object the object into Latvia's hand. Latvia looked down and saw it was a ribbon. "W-why do you want them to have it?" Lars beamed. "I'm glad you asked that! Ivan put a spell on it so it will record whatever Matthew and Gilbert say!" Latvia frowned. "I-isn't that kinda mean?" Ivan smiled down at him again and ruffled his hair. "I'm sure they'll laugh about it when it's all over. Besides, Gilbert teases you all the time, Da?" Latvia thought about. "So, you will do it, Da?" Latvia sighed. "Da."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Matthew gasped. He had thought of the perfect song! Ludwig was going to freak when he heard it. Matthew smiled, fantasizing about what Ludwig was going to do. "Uh, Mattie? You're looking kinda freaky right now." Matthew grin got even wider. "That's because I thought of your song, Gil." Gilbert gulped. He had a feeling this wasn't going to turn out well. "What is it?" Matthew smirked. "Well, I decided to return the favor of using a British singer! You are singing… Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds!" Gilbert choked on air. That's how surprised he was. "You can't make me sing that! Ludwig will kill me! He'll think I'm actually… you know!" Matthew just said, "I'm sure the extra muscle will help in hockey." Gilbert sighed. Birdie was being totally unfair. West was going to have a heart attack when he heard the song. "Fine, fine," he grumbled. "I'll do it." He dialed the number and tried not to faint.

"Hello, this is Gilbert, Ja?"

"Yeah it's the awesome me West!"

"What do you want? I'm busy."

"I have something I need to tell you."

"What?"

"Picture yourself in a boat on the river…"


	6. Chapter 6: Vamps

**This is what happens when I'm more happy than bored. I write weird stuff. Don't blame me :) **

Matthew laughed. "So much for skill," he teased Gilbert. Matthew had won. Again. And Gilbert was not happy about it. "Are you sure you're not cheating," he muttered. Matthew feigned shock. "How could you doubt me like that? Me, your best friend!" Gilbert, being the oblivious person he is, thought Matthew was serious. "I didn't mean it like that Birdie! Please don't be mad!" Gilbert said in a panicky voice. Matthew faked like he was crying, "Y-you monster!" Gilbert looked like he was going to cry, he was so upset. ""Please don't cry! I'll never say at again." Matthew couldn't take it anymore. He burst into laughter. "You should have seen your face!" Gilbert pouted. "That was totally unawesome Birdie! Almost as unawesome as your song!" Matthew laughed even harder at the mention of the song Matthew had made Gilbert do. Ludwig had almost blown a gasket when he heard Gilbert singing. "I can't wait to see Ludwig!" Gilbert shook his head furiously. "How can you say that?! He's gonna make me run like twenty miles!" Matthew smirked. "Don't worry Gil, I'm sure he'll only make you run fifteen miles." Gilbert paled just thinking about it. "That's not funny! When I collapse from over exhaustion you're paying the bill!" Matthew just laughed even harder. "The extra muscle will help you help you in hockey. I've been noticing some flab. Matthew poked Gilbert's stomach. Gilbert was deeply insulted. "Flab! Does this feel like flab?" He took Matthew hand and put it under his shirt. "That's six pack right there!" Matthew pinched Gilbert's stomach. "Your stomach begs to differ!"

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Latvia spoke up. "I-I have an idea on how to get the ribbon in." All conversation immediately stopped. "What is it, mi amigo?" Latvia blushed. He wasn't used to this much attention. "Well, I thought that I could hand them a bottle with a note tied to it. The ribbon could be used to tie the note. And the bottle could be vodka, which would make them have… interesting conversations." Lars thought for a second. "That's pretty good. But what would the note say?" Latvia smiled at the praise. "I could apologize for Ivan's prank. They know I hate it when Ivan pulls pranks on innocent people." Romano frowned. "Then why are you helping us with this prank." Latvia ducked his head and mumbled something. "What?" Latvia tried again. "I said, I'm doing Ivan a favor." Antonio smiled a muttered something about how they were so cute. Ivan smiled and ruffled Latvia's hair. "This is a most excellent plan. I have taught you well, Da?"

[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]

Matthew and Gilbert were drunk on laughter. There was no other explanation for how they were acting. They had totally forgotten about their card game and were taking dumb selfies. "Gil, we should take a picture of us being Charlie's Angels!" Matthew said between fits of laughter. Gilbert laughed along with him. "Totally! That's an awesome idea Mattie!" They took the picture and broke into fits of giggles. "Birdie, we look so awesome!" Matthew nodded in agreement; currently laughing so hard he couldn't breathe. "Oh! Now we should take one of us pretending to vampires!" Matthew's eyes lit up with an idea. "Can you hold the phone, Gil?" Gilbert giggled. "Sure!" Suddenly Matthew attacked Gilbert's neck, making loud slurping noises. Gilbert squealed in shock. "Birdie!" Gilbert collapsed with shock. "Take the picture, Gil!" Gilbert laughed so hard he was shaking. "Okay!" He took numerous pictures, making to bare his 'fangs' at the phone. Suddenly Gilbert tackled Matthew. "My turn!" He began to suck on Matthew's neck, holding back waves of laughter. Matthew shrieked and tried to shove Gilbert off him, also laughing furiously. "You're such a freak!" Gilbert smirked into Matthew's neck. "You started it!" Matthew gave up on pushing Gilbert off him. "No way!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Ivan drew Latvia aside. "You are getting better at this, Da?" Latvia blushed. "I-I suppose." Ivan frowned. "Why are you stuttering? It is just us." Latvia smiled. "Sorry," he said in a quit voice. "I'm just not used to all the attention." Ivan smiled fondly at Latvia and said, "You should be proud. You made an excellent plan." Latvia blushed and hid his face into Ivan's coat. He wasn't used to all the compliments either. Ivan ruffled Latvia's hair and hugged him. "_I_ am proud of you." Latvia turned red. "Thank you," he said, his voice soft. "Now we should get back to the others, Da? They are staring." Latvia reluctantly pulled himself out of Ivan's embrace. "I guess." When they got back the others, Antonio mumbling something again and hugging himself. Latvia tilted his head towards Antonio in order to hear him better. "… So cute…" Latvia blushed and turned his head away abruptly. He hadn't realized they were so obvious. Latvia turned his attention back to Ivan.

Matthew pouted. "I did _not _start it!" Gilbert stopped sucking on Matthew's neck long enough to giggle and say, "Yes you did!" Matthew shoved Gilbert off of him and laughed harder. "I didn't!" "Yes you did!" "No!" "Yes!" "No!" _"Yes!" _"Fine! I might have started it." "Told you so! I'm too awesome to start it!" Matthew giggled. "You're just jealous I thought of it first." Gilbert shook his head, collapsing into giggles. "You wish!" Matthew just laughed even harder. "You know it's true Gil!"


	7. Chapter 7: Vodka

**To recap: Gilbert and Matthew are stuck in the bathroom because Ivan used a spell to lock them. To get out they have to do a certain something that hasn't been revealed yet. Meanwhile, Latvia is going to put a recorder in the form of a ribbon in the bathroom so they can send the recording to Elizabeta and get HUGE laughs. Also, Latvia is gonna get them drunk. Sorry about the late update, I've been really busy with school. Really, really, sorry. **

Latvia walked towards the bathroom. You're doing this for him, he reminded himself. Gilbert and Matthew would just have to get over it. He pushed the door open. And turned red at the scene he saw before him. Gilbert and Matthew were in heap on the floor, Gilbert sucking on Matthew's neck. They were both laughing hysterically. Upon seeing Latvia, Matthew shrieked and shrank into Gilbert's lap, his face also turing red. "U-Uh," Latvia stuttered nervously. He certainly hadn't been expecting _this._ My eyes… They burn! He mentally screamed. (Poor innocent Latvia… You haven't seen nothing yet.) Gilbert just stared at him and said, "What the hell, Latvia?"

~~~Page Break~~~

Ivan stared at the door ominously. "What is taking so long, Da?" He cheerfully asked Antonio. Antonio just laughed and said, "I'm sure mi amigo is fine." Lars smirked at Ivan. "Is the big, bad, Ivan worried about little Latvia?" Lars asked in a condescending voice. Ivan merely smiled at him and said, "I'm not the one who should be afraid, Da?" Lars wisely shut up. "Vodka Bastard, I'm sure he's fine. It hasn't been that long anyway." Romano growled. He was going to kill someone if Ivan started another fight. He still had bruises from the last one. Ivan just stared at the door thoughtfully.

~~~Another Page Break~~~

Latvia thrust his gift at the two others, his face still bright red. "I, Um, This is for you." He than ran out the room. Gilbert held the present in his hands. "What does it say, Gil?" Gilbert unwound the ribbon from the bottle and read the not aloud, "Dear Gilbert And Matthew, This is an apology for Ivan's prank. I hope you find it satisfying. Sadly, I cannot get Ivan to undo the spell, but I tried my best. From, Latvia." Matthew looked at the door thoughtfully. "Funny, I had forgotten we were locked in." Gilbert shook his head. "Who cares? We have vodka!" Matthew rolled his eyes at Gilbert's antics. "That might not be the best idea. We are on a plane after all." Gilbert's eyes widened in horror. "But Mattieeeeee!"

~~~More Page Breaks~~~

"Damn," Romano muttered. "Si, I did not expect Matthew to resist." " Romano shook with fury. "That Maple Bastard is going to ruin everything!" Lars narrowed his eyes at Romano. "Don't call him that! He the only innocent one of our group!" Ivan stared at him thoughtfully. "I do not believe that is true. He is friends with Gilbert, Da?" Lars just glared at him. "I prefer to ignore that friendship. God only knows what Gilbert's done to Matthew already." Latvia's face turned red. Again. "Y-You shouldn't say that. Gilbert's been a very good friend to Matthew." Ivan just ruffled Latvia's hair and said, "My dear, sweet, innocent one." Latvia pouted. He hated it when Ivan did that. Lars laughed at the expression on Latvia's face. "I suppose we will find out." Antonio nodded. "If Gilbert does anything to hurt Matthew, we shall castrate him." Romano glowered at Antonio. "Don't talk like that, Tomato Bastard!" Lars laughed again.

~~~I Need To Stop Making Page Breaks~~~

Matthew held his ground. "I'm not getting drunk on plane Gilbert!" Gilbert pouted. "But I've always wanted to get wasted on a plane! It's on my bucket list!" Matthew sweat dropped. _That's_ what was on his bucket list? He shook his head stubbornly. "No way Gilbert. I'm not changing my mind." Gilbert brought his head close to Matthew's face. He opened his eyes innocently and whispered into Matthew's ear, "Please?" Matthew turned red. He became aware of what position they were in. Matthew was sitting in Gilbert's lap on the floor while Gilbert was breathing on Matthew's face, waiting for a reply. "I-I" Gilbert waited. Damn, Matthew hated to look Gilbert was giving him. It was like he kicked a puppy or something. "Well?" Gilbert breathed into Matthew's ear. "Fine! But you're paying my medical bill when I do something stupid!" Gilbert smiled triumphantly. "Deal."

~~~I'm Almost Done With The Page Breaks, I Swear~~~

Lars glared at the bathroom door. What the hell was Gilbert doing to Matthew? It was just silence on the recorder. He could feel his protective instincts kicking in. "That's it! I'm going to save Matthew!" Ivan placed a hand on Lars' shoulder. "It would be unwise to do that. Matthew just agreed to drink the Vodka." Lars' eyes widened. Seriously? He had been sure that a stick in the mud like Matthew wouldn't have refused. Sure, Matthew had done some crazy stuff in the past, but the were on a _plane._ It was unimaginable. Suddenly Lars let out a war whoop. "Our Matthew's finally growing up!" Antonio laughed at him. "Si, this should be interesting." Romano even smiled.

~~~Yay Last Page Break~~~

Matthew sighed. "So how do you want to drink it anyway?" Gilbert laughed. No, he cackled. "How do you think?" Matthew looked at him wearily. Whatever Gilbert had in mind, it couldn't be good. Matthew hated it when Gilbert did things like this. I mean, what if Lars ever found out about this? Matthew would be teased for life. (Good luck with that Mattie.) "Um, what is it?" Gilbert grinned evilly at Matthew. "Why dear Mattie, are we are having a drinking contest!" "Oh Maple."


	8. Chapter 8: Boxers

**I'm sooooo sorry I haven't updated in forever. It's summer though, so I should be able to update regularly now. I've seriously waited for like ever till I could get them drunk. :) Also, this was REALLY hard to write so please please review!**

Matthew took a deep breath, and downed his first gulp of vodka. His face turned red and he hacked, trying to clear his airway. "Maple," he gasped. "Raivis must have took the vodka from Ivan. It's way too strong for normal vodka." Gilbert laughed at the expression on Matthew's face. "My turn!" He shouted with glee. Gilbert grabbed the bottle from Matthew and took a hearty swig. Gilbert's eyes widened, but he had a much better tolerance than Matthew. Damn, it really was strong. Matthew finally stopped gasping and said, "Why are we doing this again?" Gilbert smirked at Matthew. "Because dear Mattie, we are stuck in an airplane bathroom with Ivan's vodka, and someone needs to introduce you to some fun." Matthew glared at Gilbert. Since when did Matthew not have any fun? He had _tons _of fun. In fact, he probably had more fun than most people! "I do too have fun!" Matthew said indignantly and grabbed the bottle back. He gulped down the vodka and slammed it down on the floor, his eyes flashing. "See, I just chugged an unholy amount of vodka!" Gilbert just stared in shock, his mouth hanging open in shock. Matthew grinned triumphantly at Gilbert.

YAY FOR INDIGNANT CANADIANS!

Lars punched the seat in front of him. "How dare he get Matthew drunk! Who does he think is?" Lars snarled. Romano glowered at the bathroom also. "The invader of vital regions." Upon hearing this, everyone but Ivan turned white. "Why did we lock mi amigo in the bathroom with Gilbert again?" Antonio moaned. Ivan smiled cheerily at all of them, not in the least bothered. "Because it is great blackmail for the future, Da?" Lars grudgingly agreed. "Still, this might turn out bad. We might need to ask someone's advice." Raivis timidly spoke up. "Um… Maybe we should ask Francis?" Antonio turned to Raivis with a look of horror. "Dios mio! Why would we do that? Francis would probably encourage them!" Lars stared at Raivis thoughtfully. That might not be such a bad idea, he mused. Wasn't Francis super protective of Matthew because he was his cousin and all that? Lars entered the conversation. "That could be a good idea. Isn't Francis super protective of Matthew because they're cousins?" Romano shook his head empathetically. "That wouldn't work bastard! Francis hates Gilbert and Matthew together! He'd probably break down the door."

YAY FOR MEDDLING FRIENDS!

Matthew giggled. The bathroom was being swirly. He tried to stand up but instead collapsed against Gilbert. Matthew threw his arms around the equally drunk Prussian. "Did you know you're my bestest friend in the whole wide world?" Gilbert smirked at Matthew and said, "Duh! I'm the awesome Gilbert Beilshmidt! Who wouldn't like me!" Matthew leaned in close to Gilbert at and whispered in his ear, "Do you want to know why I like you?" By this time, Gilbert was having a hard time concentrating on what Matthew was saying because his hair smelled like maple syrup. Gilbert buried his face in the crook of Matthew's shoulder. "Why do smell like maple syrup all the time," he muttered. Matthew grinned mischievously at Gilbert and asked, "Don't you want to know why I like you?" Gilbert finally realized what Matthew had been saying and said, "Because I'm awesome!" Matthew shook his head and grinned. "I like you because your eyes are the color of the Canadian flag, you love Guns and Roses, and most of all…" Gilbert stared at Matthew, his eyes wide. Matthew leaned even closer and said, "Your boxers have the Prussian flag on them," and promptly burst into laughter. Gilbert pouted, "What's wrong with that?! It's called pride in my country!"

YAY FOR PRUSSIAN BOXERS AND DRUNKEN CANADIANS!

Lars, Romano, Antonio, Raivis, and Ivan all stared at the ribbon in shock. Romano broke the silence when he screeched, "How the hell does Matthew know what's on Gilbert's boxers!?" Lars was doing all he could not to break down the door and save Matthew. "This was a bad idea! We should just let them out of the bathroom already!" Lars shouted. Raivis pulled Ivan to the side. "I-Ivan, what spell did you cast on them?" Ivan looked slightly guilty. "Well… They have to do something for the door to unlock." Raivis shivered at the look on Ivan's face. "W-What do t-they have to do?" Ivan just merely said, "You will find out when it happens, Da?" With that, Ivan strode back to the group. "What are they saying now Lars?" Lars turned his attention back to the ribbon. "Well right now they are arguing whether or not Matthew has a maple leaf on his boxers." Romano turned red. "What the hell? Why are they still talking about that!" By now, Romano's screeching had attracted quite a lot of attention. A flight attendant walked up to them and politely asked them to be quite, as some of the passengers were trying to sleep. Romano politely said back that no he would not fucking shut up, the bastard was sleeping with Matthew! Ivan intervened at this point and said, "If you do not leave us alone, you will die. Become one with mother Russia?" The flight attendant blanched and scurried back to the front of the plane.

YAY FOR SCARY RUSSIANS!

Matthew screamed with laughter. "I do not have a maple leaf on my boxers! That's just insane!" Gilbert smirked and said, "We'll just have to find out the hard way, won't we?" Gilbert pinned Matthew against the floor and placed his hands on Matthew's hips. Matthew stared at Gilbert in shock and shoved him off of him. "What are you doing, eh?" Gilbert leered at Matthew. "Isn't it obvious? I'm trying to pull your pants down." Gilbert dove for Matthew again pulled his jeans down with single fluid motion. What do you know, he did have maple leaf boxers. Matthew turned a deep red and screamed, "Merde! What the fuck!" Gilbert collapsed with laughter and said, "I told you! You have a maple leaf on them!" Matthew turned even redder and tried to push Gilbert off of him. "This isn't funny Gil! Give me my pants!" Gilbert just shook his head. "What's the fun in that Birdie?" Suddenly, a glint came into Gilberts eyes as he realized exactly how much he could tease Matthew. He leaned down and placed his hands on Matthew's chest. "I think this is very, very, fun, don't you think so?" Meanwhile, Matthew was turning even redder as realized Gilbert was sitting on him. While Matthew had no pants on. It didn't exactly help that Gilbert's face was now mere inches away from his. Matthew considered his options. He could try and push Gilbert away and put his pants on. That would be the respectable option. That would be the better. On the other hand… "Fuck it," Matthew muttered. Matthew yanked Gilbert towards him and crashed his lips over Gilbert's.


	9. Chapter 9: Miss Mary Mack

**I'm really sorry guys, I haven't updated in like three months. All I can say is that I was really lazy, and I got really distracted with stuff. Check out my profile for more details. I got a laptop though, so I should be able to update quicker once I can figure out how to download Word. Also, Huntress101 gets a fluffy gilbird plushie because she correctly guessed how the bathroom door opens! Another thing is that I totally forgot how small airplane bathrooms are, so we are going to pretend for the story's sake the bathrooms are slightly bigger. I have no idea where I'm going with this story, so it would be super helpful if you gave suggestions? Maybe? On to the story! (It's crack. Just warning you.)**

Matthew heard a click come from the bathroom door and froze. He pushed Gilbert off of him and stared at the door. "The fuck, Birdie?" Gilbert asked, his eyes still hazy. Matthew tapped the door with his finger and it swung open. He turned around with a huge grin and said, "The door's open! We're released from hell!" Gilbert leapt up and shrieked "No way! Whoooooooooo!" Matthew burst into giggles. "Gil, you look funny." Gilbert just shrugged and sauntered out the bathroom door, after checking to make sure Ivan was nowhere near the door. Once they both standing in the aisle, they looked at each other, grinned, and screamed together "WE HAVE BEEN FREED FROM THE DEPTHS OF HELL!" Gilbert looked at Matthew and smirked. "Race to the seats, Ja?" Matthew grinned mischievously and shouted, "GO!" He took off with Gilbert right behind him.

SOME CREATIVE THING FOR A PAGE BREAK

Lars, Antonio, Romano, and Ivan all stood up from where they had been hiding, (behind the seats). Romano face palmed and said, "I forgot the bastards were drunk." Lars ignored him and sent a death glare towards Ivan. "You made a kiss the key?! What the hell!" Ivan just shrugged. "It was good on the tape, Da?" Raivis giggled and said, "That's... Surprisingly romantic." At this, the entire group went pale and looked to Ivan to see his reaction. Ivan smiled childishly, placed his hand on Raivis' head, and proceeded to crush his spine into oblivion. Romano smirked and muttered, "Poor bastard." Lars shook his head and said, "We should order some coffee for them so they don't terrorize the plane." Antonio pouted and said, "But it's so much fun watching them make fools of themselves!" Russia answered with, "Da, we should let them be for a while." Nobody really wanted to argue with Ivan so they let it be.

GOD I'M REALLY NOT FEALING UP TO PAGE BREAKS

Matthew dove into his seat, gasping for air. "Ha! I-" Just as Matthew was about fish his wonderful sentence, Gilbert slammed into him and said, "I wasn't really trying anywaaaay! Let's do something else." Matthew, still being drunk and not having the best mental capability, answered with "We should play Miss Mary Mack!" Gilbert looked confused made a what the hell birdie face. Matthew violet eyes widened in horror. "You've never played Miss Mary Mack?! Where was your childhood?! Alfred and I used to play it all the time!" Gilbert laughed manically and said, "My childhood was obviously too awesome for this game! Kesesesese!" Matthew just shook his head sadly. "What you do is you place your hands like so and than you clap my right hand…" Once Matthew had finished showed Gilbert how to do the clapping motions, he began to sing the song. "Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack, All dressed in black, black, black…"

IM SERIOUSLY NOT FEELING CREATIVE ENOUGH FOR THIS

Lars, Ivan, Raivis, Romano, and Antonio all stared in shock as they watched our lovely lovebirds playing Miss Mary Mack. "No fucking way! Those bastards are actually playing a _child's game!_ What shit was in your vodka?!" Ivan was just looking confused, as his own childhood was spent alone so he never learned any hand games. Antonio just laughed at Romano and squealed, "Lovii! We haven't played that in ages!" Romano turned as red as, well, you know, and shrieked, "Bastardo! I never did any of that girly shit with you!" Antonio laughed again and hugged him, remembering the good ole days when the only curse word his dear Lovi knew was bastard. Suddenly they heard over the airplane speaker a piloty voice say, "The seatbelt sign is on. We are going through a rough patch of turbulence and all pasengers need to be fastened in as soon as possible."

WOOOOO! STUFF!

Gilbert and Matthew stopped their intellectually stimulating game of Miss Mary Mack and fumbled to fasten their seat belts. Seeing as they were drunk, a stewardess came by and helped them, also bringing the great gift of coffee with her. Matthew and Gilbert saluted her as she walked on, calling her the great coffee knight. Matthew turned to Gilbert and asked him confusedly, "Where is Lars? Didn't he sit next to you?" Gilbert turned to look at the empty seat next to him and shrugged, saying, "Hell if I know." Matthew rolled his eyes and replied sarcastically, "Wow Gilbert! You're such an awesome help!" Gilbert puffed his chest out and smirked, "Ja, of course Birdie! The awesome me knows everything!" (The coffee hadn't quite worn in yet.)

THIS IS TOTAL CRACK AND I'M USING TOO MANY COMMAS!

After they heard the announcement, everyone immediately began argue over who sat where. You see, dear reader, Raivis' and Lars' seats were in the back, and they were currently in the front. The group had decided that Raivis was going to sit in Ivan's lap, Romano was going to sit in Antonio's lap, and Lars got the third seat because he has no love life. Of course, Romano was throwing a fit because he didn't want to sit in Antonio's lap. "But Loviiiiii!" Spain whined. "You never sit in my lap! It's not like I have STDs or anything!" Romano turned red, (such a shock), and sputtered about how "stupid Spainards have no filters and should die in a hole." Or, yah know, something like that. Ivan became fed up with all the whining and glared cheerfully at Romano. "We should all be friends and get along, Da?" Romano shivered and sat down in Romano's lap without anymore complaint.


End file.
